


"Feel my body falling away"

by shuttymcshutfuck



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canonical Character Death, Crying, Dissociation, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Not Beta Read, Post-Season/Series 03 Finale, Songfic, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:22:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26912827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shuttymcshutfuck/pseuds/shuttymcshutfuck
Summary: Martin had sat in the hospital room for hours, just watching Jon. Waiting for him to complain about something or even look at him. But he just lay there, the only sign of life being the beeping of the monitor and the rise and fall of his chest.orMartin coping (not really) after MAG 159
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
Kudos: 18





	"Feel my body falling away"

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, thought I'd take a little break from Fictober to post this lil idea that popped into my head. I've been listening to this song a lot recently and the meaning has completely changed so I thought I'd write something with it. I hope you enjoy and as always if there's anything you think should be tagged just let me know :)
> 
> Song: Feb 14 by Cavetown

_I get up on my feet_   
_Give her one last hug_

Martin had sat in the hospital room for hours, just watching Jon. Waiting for him to complain about something or even look at him. But he just lay there, the only sign of life being the beeping of the monitor and the rise and fall of his chest. It was only when a nurse came in and talked to him that he found out how long he’d actually been there. He had sat there in silence for almost 7 hours. His mind was reeling over everything so he barely caught on to the nurse saying he should go home. Martin just shrugged then got up, kissed Jon on the forehead then left without a word.

_They're all waiting for me_   
_I wish that was enough_

He didn’t head home though, he couldn’t. With so many people gone the archives were practically empty, someone had to make sure everything was okay. He went through to the break room and made himself some tea, having to stop himself pulling out two more mugs. Martin wandered round the archives, it was so cold that he kept shivering but it made him feel present. It was on his second lap past the break room that Melanie stopped him. 

_She said she's here if I ever need someone to talk to_   
_But all I ever wanna talk about is you_

There was worry in her eyes but Martin just waved her off. He thinks he heard her say something about taking some time off but he couldn’t concentrate on her words. She guided him over to the couch and it was only then he realised here were tears flowing down his cheeks. He numbly wiped them away with his sleeve and just sat there. It felt wrong to make noise. The archives always had noise but there was no one left to make any. 

_Think I zoned out again_   
_But I still tried my best_

Martin vaguely remembers a hand on his shoulder then watched as Melanie left, giving Martin a scrap of paper with her number on it. He ended up wandering over to Jon’s office, thankfully it was unlocked. He took one step in before feeling the tears run down his face again, this time doing nothing to stop them. Jon’s office was messy as usual so He spent a little bit of time tidying up, moving dirty mugs and putting stationary back in his pen mug. He didn’t know how long he spent cleaning but it was starting to get light outside as he finished. He grabbed the cardigan Jon had left on his chair and headed up to the roof. 

_Just tryin' to buy more time_   
_When as she'd go she'd say_   
_With one regretful smile_

Martin loved watching the sunrise over London. There was something eerie but comforting about it. The bitter chill kept him awake enough to watch the whole thing as Jon’s cardigan and his jumper did little to keep him warm. He sat there alone watching the sky, thinking about everything. While he stayed and burned statements, everyone had risked their lives and now Tim was gone, Daisy was gone and Jon… Everyone was gone. He was alone. Martin pulled himself from his seat and took himself back down the stairs, walking back to archives. He started to pull himself together for the day, putting on the kettle and spoke out loud:

_I'll see you again someday_


End file.
